So today at the track workout (4 x 1600 at 5K pace, with 4 minutes in between) I found my Mantra. I was listening to a fantastic 172 BPM mix called Heaven’s Gate that I got from Podrunner.com. It had a song in it and the singer was saying “Everything Is Good.” That’s close to the ubiquitous “Life Is Good” of Tshirt fame, but it worked for me.

Did the repeats at Drake High track in 13:10, 9:57, 9:40, 9:53 – I feel a LOT faster. Of course, that might be because I have lost 18 pounds since January! Whoot Whoot! Just as I was finishing and doing my final 4 minute walk (after the last mile), the track team came out. I had done the run at the perfect time – no rain (actually, there was SUN during the last 2 mile repeats!), and no one else on the track.

Iron Will came over and cleaned Vlad and also H’s bike, which was fantastic. It didn’t rain until after he was done, so we were able to clean them outside. I’m getting cabin fever with all this rain and gloom – I’m really glad I was able to even take my jacket off and get some “Vitamin D” at the track. Yay!

For those of you who were not able to see the show yesterday (or the 3 of you who actually were in the studio audience – and accordingly have made it onto my “I Will Rescue You From A Mexican Jail” list!), here is the link to our interview yesterday. PLEASE leave me a comment and let me know what you think!!!

Here is the information that interested ABC-TV and the tips that we sent to them – I hope that you enjoy these as well!

Tips To Use To Increase Your Wellbeing In A Down Economy That Don’t Cost You Money AND Help You Lose Weight:
A No-Nonsense Approach to Relationship and Health Issues

 Introduction: Work/life balance is more crucial now than ever, given how the unexpected changes on Wall Street have affected the small business on Main Street, and trickled down into our homes and in particular our bedrooms. Our mission is to help women see dramatic changes in their lives, including better health (weight loss), increased happiness (more vibrant sex life & increased energy and drive) and improved financial security (additional money flowing into their businesses, if they are entrepreneurs). Statistics show a direct correlation between the stresses of work and the detrimental effect it has on a couple’s relationship and intimacy level; we’re teaming up to provide a no-nonsense approach to solving America’s relationship and health issues. Sandy and Sheila have a seminar coming up and the VFTB audience can go to www.empower180.com to receive information. Registered VFTB viewers will receive a 2 for one bonus on Sandy and Sheila’s books at the seminar.

1)     Women and Men are Different! (Your Life Will Be Easier The Sooner You Embrace This). 

1. Talk Your Belly Off… Women need to talk, talk, talk to get their oxytocin up, which raises levels of serotonin and decreases levels of cortisol, which is the “belly fat storing” chemical. So, decrease your stress and improve your relationship by simply putting 6 grrlfriends on your speed dial. Talking has been medically proven to be chemically necessary to women.  It will decrease your stress, and increase your receptivity to your husband and availability to your kids.
2. …Just Not To Your Husband! Men need to have a short To Do list and a goal to achieve. Men have on average 3x the serotonin of women – so if you are trying to “get your serotonin up” by talking things out with your husband instead of a woman, (a) he is going to start falling asleep like you just fed him a bunch of turkey, and (b) you’re going to frustrate the heck out of him as he’s trying to figure out the 3 things you want him to “do” while you’re on number 99 and talking a mile a minute!
3. Breathe Your Way To Wellbeing. There is also a VERY quick breathing exercise that increases a stress-reducing chemical in your body (nitric oxide) – this is one of Dr Oz’s favorites in fact – it’s important to know this breathing exercise (in through the nose on a 6 count, hold, then out on a 6 count) and “how to breathe” (into the belly versus raising the shoulders).
4. Your Husband Will Love To Hear This: More Sex Is Good.  Though we try to avoid thinking about this, we are all mammals, and touching, sensuality, and sex increases things you want to increase (feelings of wellbeing, bone density) and decreases things we want to decrease (depression, blood pressure, etc.) (here is the link to this page in Fempowerment book. If this link does not work, go to Amazon.com, search on book “Fempowerment” then use “Look Inside” feature and search on “osteoporosis” – it will take you to the correct page in the book with the facts list and references.)

2)     Create An EnvironMENTALLY Friendly Zone In Your Physical Space. Organization is key to decreasing stress and having time and space for your relationships – so take the time to clean your physical space. We all have areas of our life that are cluttered. Just as we discuss how to remove your mental clutter (next 2 tips), you need to de-clutter your physical environment.  When you get organized and de-clutter, you feel lighter and rightly so…You have lost weight in your home! This will allow you to lighten your mind and become more creative with your thoughts – and more receptive to your mate.

 3)     End The Endless To Do List. Women are extremely talented at multi-tasking.  Yet, there are only 24-hours in each day.  So, the best phrase you can learn to adopt is…”Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.” Before you commit to the next task or project, pause and ask yourself if this is something that you can and want to do. If you instead go on a Guilt Trip, you will continue to find yourself on a never ending path of To-Dos. Another great tip is, instead of saying “Yes” – if “No” is too harsh –  get a concession. For example, “I can drop off the kids if you can pick them up tomorrow afternoon.” Exchanging will help you lead a more balanced – and happier – life. 

 4)     Dump your Head-Trash™ Sheila Stewart coined this phrase. It summarizes the little voices that pipe up in our heads at the most inopportune times.  These voices are the ones that sabotage you right when you are ready to step out and take a chance, or make a bold move.  These voices say things like, “Who do you think you are?  You’re too young.  You’re too old.  You don’t have enough money. Your friend failed, how can you succeed.”  And on, and on, and on.  We have over 30,000 negative thoughts every day.  This equates to 85% of our thoughts.  That means only 15% of our thoughts are positive.  The key is to dump the voices every day and reverse the statistic.  When the voices enter your mind, dump them out. 

 5)     Detox Your Relationships and Eliminate “Frenemies.”  Just as you detox your body to remove the excess and sludge that is causing fatigue and low energy, you must detox your relationships. Once we realize that our “Head Trash” often turns into gossip, fear, and stress in our lives, we can recognize and address the fact that our worst enemy is often “inside” of us – drawing toxic people to us. By doing a Frenemy (friends who are really enemies) Audit, we can create an environment that is filled with only clean and positive relationships. This includes friends, family, business colleagues – even clients!  When you evaluate each relationship, determine if it is helping you or hindering you.  If it is hindering you, time to detox! Wean off the toxic people slowly – but surely. The key is to become aware. We are becoming more aware of what we put in our bodies, yet we so often overlook what – and whom! – we surround our bodies with! Our challenge is to ramp it up in 2010 and create a healthy and wealthy mindset and lifestyle.

 6)     Become a Balancepreneur^TM.  There are five areas in any woman’s life, and Sheila coined this word to help women find their life balance. If she is “low” in one area, she can “borrow” from another area. For example, if she is low in money but high in her social relationships, she might find a way to turn a beloved recipe into an entrepreneurial venture! What does “balance” mean – to you?

The workout for today is a Swim, then a Spin. Got up this morning to do the Swim early, then realized that at 7:30 a.m., the JCC would probably be teaming with folks trying to get a workout in before going to work. So I did some work – rebooting my computer 52,000 times as I went (more on that later) – and headed out at about 9:00.

I had to park in the “alternate” parking lot, which filled me with trepidation. I loathe swimming when there are a ton of folks in the lane. I “Iron’d Up” and headed on in – and holy cats was the locker room full! I have never seen so many people in there. I was lucky enough to snag a towel and a locker and headed out and . . . thank goodness! My “strategy” paid off – there were only about 1/2 dozen people in the pool, so I was actually able to get my favorite lane all to myself.

The workout was:

300 EZ Warmup then

3 x( 3x 50) Drills – Made up of:  3 x (25 Kick, 25 swim back) ; 3 x (25 “catch up” 25 swim back), then 3 x (25 Scull, 25 swim back).

I am not a big fan of the “Catch Up” drill. For the Kick drill, I just kick lying on my back while running one hand down the lane divider so I don’t roam all over the lane; the Scull is kind of fun to practice “feeling” the water (imagine basically a breast stroke armstroke, where you are concentrating on “catching and pushing” the water). The “Catch Up” involves putting one hand straight out, and doing the freestyle stroke with the other hand “into” that hand (e.g., tapping it), then letting  the other hand stroke, and repeating that. I think I LEARN a lot every time I do it – it really makes you pay attention to the stroke of each single arm, each single time. But breathing is a b*tch for some reason, so it’s not my fav.

Next, Breathing Drills. We had to do a 50 (2 lengths) breathing every 9 strokes, then a 100 breathing every 7, a 150 breathing every 5, a 200 breathing every 3, then a 250 breathing first 3, then 5, then 7, then 9 each length. I did OK on the “breathing every 9 strokes” set – maybe because I was fresh. The “breathing every 7″ for some reason didn’t work that well. I got to the 75 and had to actually stop in the middle of the lane, and breathe for a bit. It was odd. Breathing every 5 was fine, as was breathing every 3. The 3-5-7-9 was okay, though it taxed my “mathematical capabilities” to keep track of the laps for the 250 AND which “set of breaths” I was on! It became a bit meditative actually. Well, meditative if you take into account that every time I would get to the 7 or the 9 I was cursing and blowing. Kind of “truck driver meditative.” (No offense, Jim, if you’re reading this (smile!))

I have had a bit of a Fear Factor thing going in the water for a few sessions. I think it was brought on by doing “lane crowding” drills a few weeks ago. Last night at Book Club, I was talking with Dr. Gayle about the whole thing – she does at least 2 Ironmans a year, and in fact is now winning money in her age group. I mentioned that my worst experience was one of my last – a “fun” triathlon in Tiburon. She mentioned she had done the same tri with her two sons recently, and it FREAKED her out! She felt a bit like being in a crowded mall at Christmas and suddenly losing track of her kids. I smiled at that.

I digress, but that’s how I am – Book Club was interesting last night in fact. We met to discuss Faith and Treason, a book about the Gunpowder Plot/Guy Fawkes, but wound up spending a fair bit of time on – Me. Two of the gals are real ath-uh-letes and can’t even IMAGINE spending a DAY not doing something athletic – a few others are “mildly athletic” and then one of the other gals and I were basically in agreement that if we could just read books and cook as our form of athletics we would be VERY HAPPY indeed. Funny conversation. The athletes definitely couldn’t fathom anyone who would not WANT to “get moving” every single day, so they cheerily wanted to accompany me in training whenever I wanted. It’s hard to say “no” when folks are so excited to “help” – but (in case you haven’t figured this out yet) I am not a pleasant person when I’m training. This path to the Ironman for me is to show myself, and my coaching clients, that completely Unattainable Dreams can be made into Attainable Goals by following particular steps. When I was doing triathlons in my 20s, it was to train to get into the Marines (and I attained that Goal). This time, it’s to jump into the deep, cold water all at once and just get on with it, as suggested in Younger Next Year.

Back to that Fear Factor. Honestly – I should never EVER have seen Jaws when I was 12 – but that’s a whole different story. Talk about scarred. So last night, I discussed this with my best friend and hypnotherapist, Sue Bird. Sue is an amazing hypnotherapist. You can go back to some podcasts last year on this website if you like, in fact, where she graciously did 3 recordings for listeners to download for free – for folks who want to get Rid Of the crap in their lives and Get On With greatness. (In fact, I should probably re-download them myself!) After talking out the Fear Factor with her, she said that she would do a CD for me, addressing the issue. She does a lot of swimming herself (she’s a recordholder and swam competitively for years), and so she had a lot of ideas. Swimming today, I had to think about what would work for me. She had mentioned something like a Force Field surrounding me – that worked so long as it didn’t “surround” my arms and my head. As I got to puzzling over it more, I realized that the Force Field that I like looks suspiciously like my first Quintana Roo wetsuit! (laugh!) This made me wonder if the Fear Factor thing actually started not when we did the lane crowding drills, but when I was told that it’s likely we will not be able to wear wetsuits in Louisville. My old Quintana Roo wetsuit is long gone (gone with my svelte 26-year-old bod), but I have a surfer wetsuit that works fine . . . I just like the buoyancy a wetsuit gives. So yes, I am going to have Sue do that CD – but I also need to start putting out little offerings to the Kentucky Weather Gods and Goddesses that we can wear wetsuits in the race!

OK, enough theorizing there . . .

The final part of the workout (you thought I’d forgotten, huh?) was a 300 yard Swim, breathing “regularly,” at our race pace. That went fine. It was actually pretty nice today (it’s been in the 40s – today it’s drizzly but in the 60s) so I didn’t rue getting out of the water.

Changed, went downstairs, and discovered I only had a few bucks – the gal in the Cafe graciously comp’d me a hard boiled egg to my coffee and pumpkin nut bread. Yes, I am still “treating” myself over getting workouts done. I told her that she’d done her Mitzvah for the day!

a candid of me with my cousin in 2006 - pre-poundage

Treats. That’s the thing. I keep getting notes from friends (or sidelong glances). They either think I must be “a stick” because of the training (these are the ones who don’t live nearby), or they don’t actually BELIEVE that I’m DOING all the training (these are the ones who actually can see my body). I am heavier than I’ve ever been in my life. And it’s ugly, dimply, “omentum and butt and thighs and jowls” fat. The kind where you button your jeans and have to lug the stomach out and over the waistband. Sure, I know how I ‘got this way’ – eating too much, drinking too much, and exercising not at all. I just don’t like it. Every other time in my life that I’ve “gotten ath-uh-letic” I have been able, in a few weeks, to slim all that stuff off. Not now. I can most assuredly see that my metabolism Ain’t What She Used To Be. Just seeing photos of myself actually makes me depressed and weepy. My teammates don’t know what I “should” look like, so they give me the old “you are TOTALLY still slim, shut up” thing. I guess I should post some photos of what I “really” look like – so that people can see the difference. Where I want to be back to. But it’s not happening fast – I don’t see anything in fact, and I’m in Week 10. My Facebook and geographically disparate friends don’t believe it – but then, they haven’t seen me lately, either. 40 pounds is 40 pounds. H and I are going to Carmel for a week next week – then I’m just, sadly, going to have to put us on an Eating Plan. We really don’t want to do it – but he’s the one who came up with it. He sees how much exercise I’m doing, and that it’s not making a difference – in large part because we eat and drink on his schedule (late, rich, large portions, and with wine). I don’t want to stop doing that – but something’s gotta give. Though my teammates say ‘You’re still slim,’ my body knows it’s lugging around 40 pounds that it doesn’t know what to deal with. And that really REALLY shows on things like the Bike and the Run. Just for grins, next time you’re at the grocery store, go and look for one of those sacks of potatoes or of apples. They usually come in 5 pound, 10 pound, sometimes you can get bigger ones if you go to the country stores. But take a look – and then do the math. It’s a LOT OF WEIGHT. And my body doesn’t know what to do with it – and I’m not helping it, by continuing to eat on H’s schedule and making what he likes to eat (and drink).

Finally – so – the computer. It’s freakin’ possessed. Last night after lamenting my umpteenth re-boot, a client told me to hold a rock in one hand because it would “absorb the energy” or something along those lines. I was at my wit’s end, so I did it. And added a very nice caramel-colored pyramid-shaped crystal, right next to the Power button – to boot. (As it were.) It worked. I did what I had to do last night, and then H ran a big disc cleanup, magic whoo-haa thing all night after I went to bed. This morning – it worked for a bit, then busted again. I went Swimming, came back, still busted (and I was supposed to do an interview for my podcast today. ARGH!) I put a note on Facebook about it, and a Facebook friend said, “What about the rock and the crystal?” So I went back to H’s desk, and retrieved them from where he had worked on the computer last night – and put them back on.

And it’s working just fine now. Figures, eh?

Time to get down into the garage, and do the hour-long Bike Trainer workout. 15 minute warmup, 9 x (5 minutes HARD/2 minutes EASY), 15 minute cooldown. Laters!

Today is a “Down Day” on the triathlon schedule. And it’s a down day for me, too.

Last night H “sat me down” (after I was complaining how exhausted I was – went to bed in the very early evening in fact), and said that he had been “thinking about it” and this “Ironman thing” was a VERY bad idea, and that if he had known more about it or thought more, he would never have said it would be Okay. As he said last night, he believes that I should have started, for example, with a Century bike ride as my “goal” (part of the Ironman, and something I can’t do yet, either), because he would have done it TOO, it would have been something we could have trained for together (like our hike down the Alps, the Big Sur marathon, etc.), and then I could “still” do the Ironman next year . . . and make my self-imposed “before I’m 50″ deadline.

The thing is – I’m already IN. I’m sure there are “ways out” – but I don’t really WANT to be out. But he’s really very upset about things, like the fact that every day of the weekend (both days) there are “trainings” that I need to go to. Not like, generally, we would be doing anything significant from 9-12 on a Saturday or Sunday. But the deal is, that I will be GONE, and that I will likely come home and be tired. This weekend is the first trial of this – I have a 20 mile (oy!) bike ride Saturday morning, then a swim/run brick (in San Remote – oh I mean Ramone – no less) on Sunday. I am going to see if he will at least meet me/us on Saturday after the ride if we get something to eat, but my guess is, he won’t. And so probably staying after to have lunch or whatever they will do is a nonstarter for me. Because adding a whole social layer of friends that don’t have anything to do with him will be just Bad.

I actually get where he is coming from. If he suddenly “announced” he was going to get competition-level in Ballroom and so it would mean he would be doing a training similar to what I’m doing, I am not sure I would be happy about it. In fact, I’d probably be pissed off. And the fact that the time would just increase as training got tougher would piss me off even more. So I “get it.”

Who knows, maybe this was a big fat mistake. I haven’t said the fateful words, “Do you really want me to quit, I will find out how” yet, because I do not WANT to quit. It would be ONLY because he wants me to. But if the shoe were on the other foot, well…I would probably be feeling the same way he is. He’d be out, meeting other folks, socializing, etc. and it wouldn’t have anything to do with me or forwarding our relationship. It wouldn’t be something that “we” had chosen with our precious off time. Dunno. Maybe I was really way, way too fast at jumping into this.

Hence my getting up at 3 a.m. this morning and being unable to get back to sleep…

OK, THAT, and the fact that the more this goes on, the more it looks like a Richy Rich sport. I am SERIOUS. First, it’s just “anticipated” that everyone’s going to get a bike trainer. A used one is $100. (A bike trainer is a little contraption you put your bike on that spins the wheel and allows you to ride inside, if you didn’t know that.) THEN we’re told that we have to get bike pants – no, TWO pair of bike pants – where “the good ones, which are all you are going to want” start at $60. SIXTY BUCKS! For now, no trainer for me, and I’m going to have to make do with my 15 year old bike shorts, which have a small pad of chamois (leather) on the inside. OK, and underwear, and a pad (to be graphic). The idea of being “told” to shell out $ for this, that and the other is freaking me out. It’s assumed. YES, I will admit, that the short ride I took a few days ago I am STILL sore from. But the biking portion (which is always the one I like the least) is getting more, and more, and MORE expensive as it goes on. I guess it’s the one section with “Gear.” But holy cow. I had to break the bank to get my bike tuned up ($85, something like that) . MAYBE in a while I will get clipless pedals (seems unlikely), but that means you have to buy pedals AND shoes. Oh, and pants. And a trainer. And…

I did, however, get to realize why bikers wear those dorky bike shirts with the pockets in the back. I wore a jacket and put my stuff in the pockets, but when you’re riding, the weight of the stuff in your pockets pulls the pockets down and around, so that they’re right in front of your crotch. Not so comfy. However, not quite sure how the “back pockets” really work, as they are open. Seems like not the smartest place for a wallet and a blackberry, which is what I had. I guess I will learn….(I was given a bike shirt on the first day, because the bike guy asked if anyone did NOT have a bike jersey and I was one of about 1/2 dozen that raised my hand. Then I couldn’t wear it when I went out, because I felt like such a dork in it. I guess I will get over it – not sure I will wear it on this group ride on Saturday, I guess I should…)

Yeah, I’m down on the Down day. I’m really feeling like this was a huge fat mistake. The biking $$ piling up gets me so down that it makes my eyes tear up and my nose itch. The fact that H is not behind me on this – not that he should be, I think this was a pretty doggone selfish choice on my part, and probably not thought through, especially when I haven’t had any income for nearly 1/2 a year – is sort of the crushing blow.

Time to get outside and go grocery shopping – where are those coupons…mac and cheese, anyone…?

Yup – I’ m at it again!

So. I’ve been complaining (b*tching and moaning basically) since 2006 about being out of shape – and doing nothing about it. Oh sure, I would rally for a while around swimsuit season (or if $ was on the line . . . we did a “Biggest Loser contest about a year ago), and then WHUMP, I would be back on the couch. Not that unhappy about it, either. So Sue Me.

So a while back, I did Tony Robbins Unleash The Power Within (UPW). During this experience, you look at things that are holding you back, things you would like to do before you die – before another year has passed, even.

I’ve never, ever been an athlete. When I was a kid, my dad (a doctor) could sometimes be cajoled into writing doctor’s notes to keep me out of whatever athletic endeavor they were trying to put me in. I would do extra music classes, extra cleaning of classrooms – nearly anything – to get out of gym. Not quite sure why. I was never, ever, the “fresh air and working out” type (which my parents, though both brainiacs, actually always have been).

Come college, I actually found out I was fairly coordinated (who knew?) and made varsity Fencing my Freshman year (we even made it to the NCAA Finals). I also took Shotokan Karate. I was never that good with “quick” stuff (tried Jazzercise – oy, I was a disaster), but very good at things like ballroom dancing, karate, fencing, etc. Sadly, of course, I had never had a “ball put in my hands” until college – so though 6′2″ and left-handed, any basketball/volleyball/etc. type game was really kinda “out.” (I still have very short gals who are VERY good at volleyball try to chat me up to join pickup volleyball games. ‘I must be good, I’m so tall,’ they always say. In eviler times, I would say ‘how’s your horsemanship?’ to the very short ones…I try to be better now…)

So. Anyway. After college I fell in with a fairly “fit-ish” crowd, and started doing triathlons when they were JUST getting started. Scott Tinley, then later Mike Pigg, folks like that (“dinosaurs” if you do tris now). I actually did quite a few of them – never did that well (came in 6th woman overall in the Bahamas Triathlon, but I think that’s because most of the participants had been drinking rum all night) – but did ok.

My husband and I did the Big Sur Marathon now back in…oh, something like 2002 or so – then we walked the length of the French Alps about 2 years later. I always need a ‘goal’ to work towards – and those were good ones.

So, at UPW, I walked in with a desire to “get fit.” I knew I really had to get something going – huffing and puffing and creaking was getting me down. I walked OUT of UPW with a completely insane goal – Ironman before I was 50. Yeah. From she who can’t run 30 minutes.

Then, I got a Team In Training email. So, I went. And talked to the very nice young hardbody who coaches part of the TNT training team (a little unclear how it works – I was late, no parking). Thought about it, called H, got a categorical “you cannot afford to do this, you’re going to have to make this work with your 10 year old bike, and how exactly did you say you were going to pay for this?” Yup – signed up.

So, November 7th is “kickoff.” I know one gal who is on the Ironman team – and she’s just finished a couple of marathons. I think starting with ONE discipline you know you can do might be smarter…but so it goes.

I actually bought my ticket today. Something like $550. That’s about 1/3 of my current monthly income. That really IS insane. Then I went to Kaiser (doctor’s appointment for an issue) and the nurse a propos of nothing started talking about her new $2000+ bike she had built for her by “this great guy in San Rafael” – when “bikes usually run about $7000 and up for a good one.” I think my clunker is going to have to make it.

So, am I insane? Yeah, likely. But as T Harv Eker once said, How you do one thing, is you how you do Everything. And this is pretty much me – jump in, feet first.

Hi-YAH!

Here she is – Ms. Sheila Stewart!

You’ve all heard me talking on a couple of podcasts about our upcoming event in October with Empower180.com in their “What Women Want” Series. Sheila and my working subtitle for our part in the series is, Recession proof your relationship: How the economy is affecting you in the bedroom.

As a few of you have asked what the seminar will be about, let me give you a bit more information. Sheila and I will be addressing American’s health, relationship and financial woes with practical, realistic advice.

In today’s volatile economy, it’s not just businesses’ bank accounts that are suffering; entrepreneurs’ intimate lives are detrimentally influenced by the stresses of keeping a small business afloat. It’s all about the she-conomy and how women must balance being everything for everyone with trying to find time and space for their passions.

As you know, I’m passionate about helping women weave sensual femininity into their daily lives. My part of the evening will include a lot of rousing “body chemistry enhancing” moments – don’t be scared! If you come you will have a BLAST.

Balancepreneur Sheila Stewart, a serial entrepreneur & author of Backwards in High Heels: A Woman’s Guide to Succeeding in Business, is an expert in teaching harmony between the five life accounts (Money, Relationships, Spirituality, Health and Network). She says that a work/life balance is more crucial now than ever, given how the unexpected changes on Wall Street have affected the small business on Main Street.

Our clients have seen dramatic changes in their lives, including better health (weight loss), increased happiness (more vibrant sex life & increased energy and drive) and improved financial security (additional money flowing into their businesses).  Statistics show a direct correlation between the stresses of work and the detrimental effect it has on a couple’s relationship and intimacy level.

We hope on October 7th to give you a little taste of Sheila’s Balancepreneur program and my fEmpowerment Finishing School & Training Academy, to provide you with a no-nonsense approach to solving your – and America’s! – relationship and health issues.

Click below to get to the interview – you’ll love it!

 

 BONUS INTERVIEW PODCAST: Coffee Chat with Balancepreneur Sheila Stewart, Author of Backwards in High Heels: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

…I am a huge HUGE hunk of blue cheese, baguette, bell pepper, tomatoes, meatballs, and a couple glasses of wine.

Sounds pretty good, eh? The problem is – this is what I ate when I returned home from a FABOO workshop (more on that in a second) – at 11:00 last night! And then SLEPT on it!

AND I had dinner, too, at a more “regular time.” So why did I eat this? Because my darlin’ husband was sitting on the couch, watching a new TV show (Warehouse 13, something like that) eating it, and it looked good. Noooo I was not “hungry.”

We’re not talkin’ a taste. We are talkin’ serious blue cheese hunkage.

Now that I signed up to be a BeachBody coach, I am being way more conscientous about getting out and doing SOMETHING to move my body every day (even if it’s walking the dog, instead of just “letting him outside”). I even did an “accountability partnership thang” with Sheila Stewart last night after her chat at Empower180 – we both have, as she lovingly put it, “pork chops” on our sides, and so we’re going to text each other to get movin’.

See, the thing is though, this just doesn’t keep me away from the food. Even when we were on that yoga retreat in Peru…my hubby is like James Bond in From Russia With Love. Remember the suitcase full of caviar, champagne, etc. that he snuck into the “Health Spa”? That’s my “James”! We went “over the wall” – dining on wine, beef, alpaca, cuy, you name it, while everyone else was having vegetarian. Yeah, bad. just SO BAD. Then we would sleep IN and not do the yoga in the morning…!!!

I start out really well in the mornings. I usually have a cup of Creme Caramel tea with a little stevia, and a Shakeology shake. The “Creme Caramel” tea is one of those Lipton teas that if you add a tiny bit of stevia (which doesn’t increase your insulin), tastes GREAT and has no calories. I have a sweet tooth, what can I say (heck, I have a FOOD tooth!), and I love starting my day out with one of these, especially if I can sip it when out walking the dog.

For lunch, I’m usually good too! I might have a snack in between breakfast and lunch of a chicken leg – then lunch a big salad, something like that. THEN….3:00 happens.

I turn into like Solitaire Jekyl. I will eat ANYTHING that’s in my way. And I don’t care. I have the “good Soli” in the back of my head saying “hello, get your HAND OUT OF THE CHOCOLATE CHIPS and WHAT are you doing with a glass of wine?” – but I don’t listen to her. I’m sure there is some chemical reason – brain dip, serotonin dip, avocado dip…whatever. I’m sure I should do something like work out at 3:00. But Evil Soli takes over and it’s OVER! I’m watching Bones reruns on TV and snacking on whatever I can find. Then I make dinner for my James, snacking all the while, and eat that, too!

Mind you, there isn’t that much “bad stuff” left in the house (the Evil Girl Scout Cookies and chocolate chips are gone now) - but my hubby loves to bring home things like baguettes and cheese. Somehow, he has no problem taking a small slice of cheese, and then a slice of bread, and munching on that, and calling it a day. Me? I’m like a freakin’ wolverine, I just wallow in the stuff. Bad ferret. Bad.

My brain says that I am working so hard on all other stuff – NOT spending $, 3 businesses, coaching, relationship, etc. – that it just doesn’t want to “deal with” this issue “too.” I have made a “deal” with my brain (scary how that happens, innit?) – that if I keep working out every day (yes, walking the dog counts as working out, because I wasn’t doing it before), I won’t bother it right now about the food rampages. Working out every day AND getting onto a more even keel foodwise makes my little brain stamp its tiny little feet in tantrum.

But I DO KNOW that the reason I don’t really want to work out – the reason that it’s hard for me to even walk uphill with the dog without huffing and puffing – is BECAUSE I’m doing things like eating hunks of Stilton on baguettes and drinking red wine and then going to bed right afterwards. I’m lucky I don’t wake up with a cheese-shaped hunk sticking out of my thigh. I DO KNOW that’s why I feel like crap. I do. I do.

And I can type this feeling all virtuous because it’s 9:00, I have done my walk, I have 2 hours of pole dancing class in an hour, and I have had tea and my Shakeology and feel TOTALLY FINE. My will power is HIGH.

Just waitin’ on 3:00…!!!

Yeah, ok, so FINE. I “admitted it.”

When we were on the 2nd 1/2 of our trip in Peru (you can see the photos at www.facebook.com/fempowerment), we were travelling with a group. In the group was a guy who works out constantly. He couldn’t BELIEVE that there just wasn’t SOMETHING that I LOVED to do with my body. Now, granted, this was a yoga-related retreat. Unfortunately as H got very very sick, I wound up doing yoga 4 times – out of about the 16 I “should have.” (Hard to get up at 6:00 in the morning when you’ve been kept awake all night by coughing and worrying about your husband.)

So, I tried to ’splain (Lucy) that when I was a kid, working out or being outside or “playing” was pretty low on my priority list. No one seems to believe this. I remember being at another “women’s retreat” in Mexico, where we were all supposed to “release our inner child” – and to be true to my “inner child,” when all the gals were leaping and throwing water on each other and giggling and playing on swings, I read a book. They thought I was odd, and not “getting into the spirit,” and all sorts of negative things.

But see, this IS what I was like as a kid. Once I reached college, there was a wonderful gal in my dorm. Her name was Susan Lundin. Everyone loved her, and she was a wonderful, genuine gal. She played beach volleyball, a sunny disposition, and I adored her. So I decided to “become” her.

That sounds a bit odd – but I had NO IDEA really how to “be” a person like that. So I did what Susan did. It was a turning point in my life. If you “know me now,” then you really know Sandy-as-Susan. Because Sandy-as-Sandy – the girl who would rather lie in bed and read books than interact, go outside, “play games” – was put to bed my freshman year at UCSD.

But she’s still in there. Here I am, quite SERIOUSLY overweight for me. I’m nearly 180. That’s a huge freak-out, because my “comfortable weight” is 145. That sounds like nothing when you know how tall I am – but I am VERY “slight” of build. My wrist isn’t even 4″ around (that’s how they “tell”). And I have really packed the pounds on, let me tell you – it’s definitely not “water weight.”

So, I’m on the Beach Body plan (and have signed up to be a coach – heck, I need one, why not BE one)? I got out this morning to walk the dog…and YES, I really DO like to walk the dog in the morning. Not one of these ‘fast walks’ like H does when we walk – where I’m out of breath and cross to be outside. No, a dog-sniffing-the-flowers saunter for an hour. OK, so, fine, it’s not a “workout.” But see, that’s the problem here.

When I was a kid, I would do ANYTHING – and I mean ANY-THING – to get out of gym. I wound up getting very good at music, because IF you were very good at music in grade school you could ultimately play (and tour) with the grammar school/high school “band.” (If you can call recorders, handbells, etc. a “band” – hey, what can I say, this was the Dominicans.) I kissed up to teachers who I knew would have other things for me to do when, say, GYM was on. I’m lucky I learned to swim at all, frankly…and when I “had to” go to gym class, I was always picked last – because I didn’t have a lot of friends who would “call me over,” but also because people were so shocked to see me there, they weren’t “used to” me being on ANY team.

My stalking-of-Susan-Lundin changed all that. I actually took up fencing and karate as a freshman, because they were the only sports that someone like me (tall, left handed, coordinated but with NO history of gym) could even feel comfortable trying. Interestingly, I made Varsity my first year in fencing – and we even made it to the NCAA finals. I didn’t really like working out that much – though I did feel better not being out of breath – but heck, if that’s what Susan did, that’s what I was going to do, too.

So here I am, a girl-who-doesn’t-like-to-workout-and-who-used-to-have-a-roaring-metabolism, in a body 35 pounds too heavy. It feels weird. I’m upset that I can’t keep my mouth shut when ANYTHING I happen to like rolls around – a remnant from a voracious metabolism. My metabolism started slowing when I was in my 30s, but “back then” I was doing crazy things like marathons, triathlons (even training folks for triathlons)…HOW did I get my mind around doing that?? I really have no idea.

But here I am. I hate working out – and I know I “gotta.” But being a BeachBody Coach, I have read a number of the other Coaches’ bios, etc. – and they are all so RA RA RA we LOVE working out we are SO FIT come and JOIN us! And I just wanted to have a little, private rant here that NO, I am not like them. But I am a coach anyway. And I’m going to coach me, and if you want me to coach you (it’s free – www.BestLifestyleNow.com) I can do that. Maybe some of you are like me – lived a bit too much of the “good life,” KNOW that you need to get your groove on, but would really rather just read a book or, oh, have some more champagne :-) I would say I would be the coach for you, if so.

I’m gearing myself up to do a workout now – probably around noon. Doesn’t mean I have to like it.

So, I have had a few “pokes” and emails wondering where I have been! First of all, we just returned from a month in Peru – yes, practicing all those Chapter 1 Bond Girl packing skills! The plan is to post the photos on my facebook page which is www.facebook.com/fempowerment – I have sorted them out, now just figuring out how to get them off H’s laptop and onto Facebook. I’ve never been the most technical of grrls!

And why so little blogging? Twitter. I admit it. I have started Tweeting, and it’s so easy, that I have become a slacker here. Mea maxima culpa. I’m fempowerment on Twitter – so if you’re there, say HEY, I’d love to hear from you!

Lots of stuff going on since I last posted (besides the Peru trip). I’ve finally reached the highest total weight I have ever been in my LIFE – by pounds and pounds. How’d it happen? Stress, mainly. I’m a stress eater (and wine drinker). Money stress, trip stress, time stress, managing 3 businesses AND trying to do the work at the same time…you know the drill. I wish I was a stress RUNNER, but even as a kid, I was never much for exercise. We were raised that studying/books/reading/etc. were GOOD, and exercise was just something that you did in between. My folks are both VERY active – so what happens when you have a kid that isn’t attracted to exercise naturally??

I was lucky to have a great metabolism when I was younger (growing to be over 6′ probably helped!) Then when an adult, I found out I was fairly coordinated for a gal who never really had gym as a kid (thanks, private school), so I became part of the UC varsity fencing and karate teams. I luckily kept working out, finding usually karate dojos to join as I moved around the country, and then for a time my friend Leslie and I decided to do triathlons – which we did. I guess that once you get the rock rolling, it keeps rolling.

I was in the greatest shape of my LIFE for our wedding back in 2006. I was HOT HOT HOT! Unfortunately, we went on a 6 week honeymoon that incorporated a lot of driving, riding on barges, and eating, drinking, eating and drinking! Then I moved into a completely sedentary, high-stress job for nearly a year…rescued by my publisher telling me I HAD TO GET THE BOOK FINISHED (and H agreeing to pay me to stay home and do it – how’s THAT for a great husband?)

I just never really got back in the workout “groove.” My life had been completely taken over by working out to get into that tiny tiny wedding dress (I wore my mom’s – I’m 6′2″ she’s 5′7″ – don’t even ask!) I am now 35 lbs heavier than I was back then – and it’s some SERIOUS weight, the nasty kind – the kind that makes you look at clothes in your closet and say “WHAT? Who’s closet IS This?”

I don’t like being fat (no one does, I know). But it’s tough to get the rock “rolling” again. I have recently signed up to be a BeachBody coach (you can check it out at www.BestLifeStyleNow.com if you want) – and hope that this will help me get back in the groove. BeachBody has some great workout stuff – I already had a number of the DVDs – and this gives me a “Community” to report back into.

Interestingly, I came back from Peru and got an intestinal bug…I hope it’s not a “real” bug as in creepy crawly (my dad brought this possibility up – uck). Even with that, I am serious fat-packed at that 30+ extra pounds. I’m trying not to hate myself for being so “weak” – and I want it all to fall off like TOMORROW. Yeah yeah, where’s that magic wand???

Before we left for Peru, one of my best grrls Tweeted me – I was saying something about not fitting into the clothes that I wanted to bring (small wonder, last time we travelled I was at least 12 lbs less booty), and she wrote back basically “Yeah you’re fat but you’re happy, you have a great life and a man who loves you” blah blah. Of course what do I read? the “yeah you’re fat” part. (She didn’t really say that, but I think it was something like “Yeah, well, you have some to lose” or “Yeah, well, sure you’ve put on some pounds” or something.) This is a gal where we used to be mistaken for twins all the time – no issue now. And she just had a baby.

So, I’m here blogging, because I feel bad that I haven’t – and I thought I’d let ya’ll know that when you’re in the depths of whatever-it-is, we all get there. My publisher wants me to do a workbook based on my book – which I want to do, but right now, I can’t concentrate on that. Then again, my thought is to work THROUGH my book just like a newbie reader would – maybe that would help me with the workbook!

I’m off to a Tony Robbins 4-day “thang” end of this month, then the Dallas eWomenNetwork convention for 4, and all that jazz. I am meeting a friend in Dallas who has become my BeachBody coach – and I need to look hot by then! At least – hotter than THIS. So I’m working out…I’m on Day 2, but at least I got up this morning.

Peace, out!

Now, about a week ago, when I was in New Orleans (N’Yaw’lins), I went by a tealeaf reading shop called The Bottom of the Cup. I would put links in here, but I’m too lazy tonight. Anywho – I have called a guy there now and again over the years – name of Otis – and wanted to meet him in person. He was great! Looked NOTHING like I thought he would, which was fun, too.

While there, I saw some voodoo dolls. They were “good” voodoo dolls – to be used to help remake your life. One that jumped out at me was “Flambeau” – a gentleman in a top hat with a wily smile – and his “missin” was to “Fire You Up.” I thought – I could use that! His tag was even “singed” around the edges.

NOW, since Flambeau has come into my life – as mentioned below – I have been called out of the blue by ABC-TV to be part of their new show HOME, launching nationwide on their new HD channel some time end of this month. That was Monday – taped it, had a blast. Yesterday, I got a call from the San Francisco Chronicle. They want to do a sidebar on me for their “crazy things folks do for exercise” column – someone turned me in, no doubt! – and so I met them today at the S Factor and we did a photo shoot of me pole dancing.

Mind you, I think once they tell me when it’s going to run, I’m going to have to have everyone I know go out and raid all the newspaper boxes – because they made we wear THE TINIEST little frilly shorty short shorts known to man, and of course my 6″ heels! Yeah yeah, and I’m currently about 25 pounds overweight. Serves me right not to lose it all…but I guess Flambeau couldn’t wait on that!

So that’s what’s been up with me – pretty wild, huh?

So, this is my “Do Over” post. For what seems like forever, I have been a fairly poor correspondent (and worse podcaster!) I had everything “set” last year – podcasts were going up once a week, blogging often, all that jazz.

What happened? Happy married life? Complacency? A little of both?

So here I sit, 172 pounds (oh lord, I said it – of course, it was 179!), and not “walking my talk.” Again, not sure how it snuck away from me, but part of it definitely has to do with the fact that I have started a new business (SendOutCards – check out sandy-shepard.com if you haven’t already), we travelled a LOT last year (yeah, I know, you’re feeling SO SORRY for me), and, again, well, I just got sorta kinda “fat and happy.”

We just returned from the Big Island of Hawaii (see? I know you feel SO SORRY for me), and during that time I had a “Time Out” and got to thinkin’. We absolutely adore staying at the Four Seasons – a friend of ours has a condo there (I think it cost $2 mil – yes, really), and it’s just “the good life.” Get up, condo is clean and clear, go down to the amazing gym where “cabana boys” hand you towels and water and spritz you with Evian and help you set up your weight routine….lounge in the meditation area…go down and watch the sea turtles in the ocean…

My publisher has wanted me to start thinking about a Workbook to go “with” my book – and what came to me in Hawaii is that perhaps what I need to do is work through my own book – and blog it – getting back to the basics that I myself advocate. (What a concept!) I was going to start right when we got back – but air delays, gate delays, weather, and then laundry, groceries and chores sort of blew that idea. However, the current “plan” is to start kinda today (with this post), and then get out my own dog-eared copy of fEmpowerment and work through it…and let ya’ll know how it’s going.

I plan to podcast it as well – my “James” finally got my upload capabilities working, and re-uploaded all my podcasting software. As I probably blogged, my computer blew up in December and I was without it for 2 weeks – then when I got the big bill (grrrr) and it turned out it could NOT be repaired “after all”, had to buy a new one….which meant my James re-uploading everything out of backups, downloading freeware, the works. The final “bit” of it he did last night. So I have no more excuses.

I have been uploading my Granddad’s diary from WWI – which I think I will finish today – I am not sure if anyone is actually interested, but I’m really excited to have it available. Then, time to just regroup, and Find My Inner Bond Girl and Let Her Out!

Are you dreading the Freshman 15? I won’t lie to you. I was a victim of the Freshman-and-Sophmore 25! In fact, it took me all the way to grad school to figure out how to eat properly on campus. Campus cafeterias are full of temptations, from all-you-can-eat buffets to twice-daily desserts. But I learned how to beat them, and you can, too. Here’s a list of tips I wish someone had given me when I started university.

1. Save yourself for the really good desserts

If your cafeteria is anything like mine was, you could eat two desserts a day. That is the path to the Freshman 50! But you don’t want to deprive yourself. What’s a girl to do? I came up with a simple rule for myself: eat only the really good desserts. My college had a dessert night every few months with gourmet pastries. Every few weeks, we had a fancy dinner with luxury cakes. You know what, if I’m getting gourmet desserts every few weeks, I don’t mind missing out on the three-day-old apple strudel on the lunch cart today.

2. C is for coffee (That’s good enough for me)

Getting up for an 8 am class is hard. Sometimes your brain needs a little kick-start. But that doesn’t mean to grab a Venti Frappuccio. If you do, you can down 500 calories before you’re awake to enjoy it! To get your caffeine hit, get a regular coffee, load it with milk and sugar, and it’ll still be less calories than a “coffee drink.” If you want to consume 500 calories in a drink, that’s great. But just remember point #1. 

3. The new SS: soup and salad

Here’s a trick I learned from Barbara Rolls’ Volumetrics. If you eat a bowl of soup before your meal, you’ll naturally eat less of the main course. And you can eat a ton of salad, feel full, and not consume too many calories. It’s probably a good idea to eat at least one salad a day, anyway. And if someone else is preparing it, why not! A word of warning, though: stay away from the cream-based soups and go easy on the dressing. Those calories add up!

4. The janitor doesn’t cares if you finish your vegetables (or anything else)

Maybe you’re from a family where Mom wouldn’t let you have dessert if you didn’t finish your veggies. Maybe she used the “children are starving in Africa” line. This may have led you into the bad habit of cleaning your plate, even if you’re full long before that. Now that you’re on your own, no one cares! Certainly not the janitor who’s collecting the plates or emptying the garbage! Eat until you’re full, then stop. And remember, it takes the stomach 20 minutes to send the “I’m full signal” to the brain, so don’t rush for seconds right away.

5. Don’t eat out when you’re eating in

Most cafeterias I know offer some good choices… and some really bad choices. I could have had pizza and burgers twice a day for a year, if I wanted. But I bet you consider those “eating out foods” already. Think about how often you want to eat out and plan accordingly. Sure, grab a burger every now and then, but don’t make it your first pick.

Attention Bond Grrls “of a certain age”:

Okay, maybe you’re now faced with cooking your own meals. Spending hours cooking can be a time drain. But on the other hand, you can control exactly what you put in your body. You’re not subject to the whims of the Olga the cafeteria chef. Everybody can use the tricks above, not just college students. Just make sure that indulgences are special occasions, not everyday events.

Okay, SO. About a year ago, I was fat (happy), and in need of a new driver’s license. Contrary to my own good advice in my book fEmpowerment, I basically went down to the DMV, and took the photo.

I’d put on the makeup, I’d done the hair, but….BAAAAD. So VERY VERY BAD. Lordie lordie.

Of course, it doesn’t help that my last Driver’s License photo (and my last passport photo, I might add) where fantastic. How that happened, I have no idea – we all know how bad “those photos are.” But there you go.

So I have a driver’s license photo that looks like I’m Frankenstein’s stepsister (I actually keep the old, expired one in the little driver’s license “window” because the new one is so frightening). I wasn’t gunna let that happen with the passport.

Why the passport right now? Well, we’re going on a phenomenal journey to Peru in June…so I thought I’d have plen-tee of time to lose the weight, etc., especially as I started losing at the end of last year. As I have posted before, weight-wise, I am 1/2 way there right now. HOWEVER, I recently won a trip for 2 to Cozumel, through SendOutCards. (Hey, it’s NICE to have a job that, if you do well, gives you things like camera, jewelry, trips…love it!) The “rule” for cruises to Mexico now is that your passport has to have 6 months “left on it” for you to go.

The problem? Mine expires in July! I thought I might want to get one for the June Peru trip - but not for Mexico in March! Yikes!

So again, I’m 1/2 way to my weight goal – but we all know that the face fat is one of the last “to go.” But I needed to get the passport goin’ ASAP.

THIS time, following my own advice from fEmpowerment [click here, then search for pages 84-86], I set the day aside. First, I went to the hair gal. She did me up. Then I went to my friend’s house who is a whizz at makeup. SHE did me up. Then I went to the passport photo place – which is also where my mailbox is – and since the gal there was not busy…I made her take TWENTY (digital) photos. Click-flash-look. Too serious. Click-flash-look. Hair too weird. Click-flash-look. Head too tilted. Click-flash-look. Too goofy. You get the…picture.

The gal was just laughing and shaking her head. But she was a good sport. Of course, I also handed her a $20 bill for the $12 passport photo charge and “waved” for her to “keep the change” – my guess is none of it will go in the till at all – but she was more than happy to keep snapping. We got it down to one, but I thought it was a little serious, and my head was kinda tilted (and I still felt my face looked fat), but she liked it well enough. I went to the post office to get the passport info in – and the passport folks had gone home early. I looked at the photo and went BACK – she was still there, shook her head when I walked in…and we took more (she didn’t even charge me). I finally wound up with one that I liked mo’bettah. So tomorrow I’m off to get it passport-i-fied.

The photo isn’t as great as the AWESOME one currently on my passport. Of course, I’m also at least a decade older, and “wiser” (or is that just “a decade more of life/work/stress under my belt”?) But heck, the photo is SO MUCH better than I think 90% of the passport photos I’ve ever seen – and LIGHT years better than my Franken-driver’s license.

Sure, I wish I could have taken it in a couple months like planned – so my face wouldn’t be “showing the heavy” quite so much. But it is FINE. And I did “what I said to do” in the book – I had set that passport photo as a goal and was working towards it - I just didn’t know that I would need to push the goal “forward” about 3 months!

I feel SO relieved though, because compared to the driver’s license, I’m a Hollywood starlet. Phew!

SO, this year, after 2 years of just basically “letting it all hang out” (meaning – I have a James that loves champagne, foie gras, and all things lovely and fattening!) I am in a Biggest Loser contest. A few gals in my neighborhood and I decided that instead of spending the $ for Weight Watchers, etc., we would meet once a week, weigh in, and support each other on Facebook.

We each paid $100 – and we are paying it out 25% first month, 25%, and then 25% last month, with an extra 25% to the person who loses the biggest percentage overall. Each month, it “re-ratchets” so that anyone could win – your weigh at the beginning of the 2nd month (and the 3rd month) is your “zero.”

So, I won the first month! $225 to me – yay!! I have lost 7.46% of my body weight. My body fat since 1/5 has gone from 29.40% to 24.50%, my hydration from 50.10% to 54.60%, and my muscle from 34.30% to 37.30%.

I want to win the 2nd month, too! I am 1/2 way to where I want to be (weight at my wedding 2 years ago). And given that…time to get out and exercise!